George Carlin Quotes

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Comedian | May 12, 1937 - June 22, 2008
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Quotes to Discover

Know, first, who you are, and then adorn yourself accordingly.
Epictetus
I thought Bolt was amazing, I mean, beating the world record and slowing down at the end, how galling has that got the for the other athletes? I never managed to do anything in 9.69 seconds, it took me ten seconds to watch him do that.
Usain Bolt
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Success doesn't change you; fame does.
Whitney Houston
He is a very smart cookie, Michael. He knows what he wants, he knows what he is doing. I have nothing but admiration. Also, he is a very kind person.
Michael Jackson
Michael Jackson gave us pride. He gave us pride in our blackness, gave us pride that we can look good and be cool and be worldwide. Michael Jackson is a fucking icon. And I believe they took Michael Jackson down because he had too much power.
Michael Jackson
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We also know first hand that Flash is the number one reason Macs crash.
Steve Jobs
Nobody makes me do anything I don't want to do. It's my decision. So the biggest devil is me. I'm either my best friend or my worst enemy. And that's how I have to deal with it.
Whitney Houston
Bob Dylan: I do know what my songs are about.
Playboy: And what's that?
Bob Dylan: Oh, some are about four minutes; some are about five, and some, believe it or not, are about eleven or twelve.
Bob Dylan
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You know the best thing about necrophilia? You don't have to bring flowers. Yeah, usually they're already there. Isn't that nice? It's nice. It's convenient.
George Carlin
Life seems to me essentially passion, conflict, rage... It is only intellect that keeps me sane; perhaps this makes me overvalue intellect against feeling.
Bertrand Russell
The quality of your life is the quality of your communication.
Tony Robbins
Put the dwarf within you to sleep.
Tony Robbins
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To be outspoken is easy when you do not wait to speak the complete truth.
Rabindranath Tagore
So it's gonna be forever
Or it's gonna go down in flames.
You can tell me when it's over
If the high was worth the pain.
Got a long list of ex-lovers,
They'll tell you I'm insane.
'Cause you know I love the players,
And you love the game.
Taylor Swift
We are all in a cage match, mixed martial arts battle royale with agents of intolerance and braying incompetence, the malevolent equals to Imperial stormtroopers, Lex Luther, and Loki. And we could use a superhero right now.
Tom Hanks
I try to keep it positive and play it cool
Shoot up the playground and tell the kids to stay in school
Eminem